Last night I had stayed at the office until after 11:00.
Harish, the last one out before me had told the guard to follow me and make
sure I got a taxi. Tonight, the guard assumed the order was still standing at
9:30, following me down, despite our mostly 1 word vocabulary discussion
“It’s OK, stay” – “OK” -- “I’ll
be OK” - “OK” – “Taxi OK, not problem”
– “OK”. The first taxi was driven by some guy who
didn’t look Indian at all, pasty appearance in the dim glow of the green
flashing LED’s of the battery powered Durga statue glued to his
dashboard. Having learned to keep any ancillary words out of my speech, I
uttered “Hyatt, 100?”. He stared back at me as if I wasn’t
speaking his language. The guard leaned in and shouted “Hyatt
Hotel” followed by something that sounded like
“giddyup-kyah”. I said again “Hyatt, 100 rupee?”
The driver nodded in that charming Indian head-nod and I climbed in. Only
then did I recognize him as that guy from the strung out on meth/crack/heroin
movie (Trainspotting?). Red eyes, paan stained red teeth, covered in sweat,
crazy hair.
A moment later he turned to me and said “Hyatt, 150
rupee”. I laughed, waved my hand as if to say I would get out here. He
said “OK, 120” and stepped on the gas.
He turned up the radio to an ear splitting loud, turning on
the inevitable Hindi movie soundtrack song. Off we went, racing down the not
yet deserted streets, not avoiding any potholes, chasing old women out of the
way.
We hit at least 50 mph by Nikko Park, honking a little
Maruti off the road as the singer sang “Kali kee aah mee a deeyaa”
to a soundtrack that seemed suited for a 60’s western than “The
Fast and the Furious:Kolkata”.
We took the big wide turn onto the East Metro Bypass, under
the flyover, without slowing. A couple of teenagers on a big old bike fell
over as we raced by them. A newer, white Ambassador tried to pass us. My
driver spat out the window at it and coaxed the last bit of speed he could out
of his ancient taxi. We won the race right at the turn to the hotel, cutting
off the other car behind a lorry.
I will take the taxi drivers of India any time over a theme
park roller coaster, especially the Bengali drivers.